Your Freedom is Yours

Nobody can give it to you or take it away.

Nobody can give it to you or take it away. They can suppress it, they can obstruct it, they can restrain it, but they cannot take it away. Only you can give it away, surrender it, renounce it.

You give away your freedom by suppressing yourself, by doing what deep inside you feel is not right, something you do not want to do, you will sense it.

As such, nobody can give it back to you. It does not belong to you.

I remember reading a letter of an American marine that he wrote from prison after refusing to go back to Iraq for the 3rd time. After coming back for the first time, he no longer believed it was the right thing to do and did not want to go back there, but he gave in to the pressure, to the fear of going to prison, being judged as a coward and so on. 

I remember reading a letter of an American marine that he wrote from prison after refusing to go back to Iraq for the 3rd time. After coming back for the first time, he no longer believed it was the right thing to do and did not want to go back there, but he gave in to the pressure, to the fear of going to prison, being judged as a coward and so on. The next time he was told to go, he stayed true to himself; he refused to go back and ended up in prison. I never forget the last words in his letter. “It is strange, I am sitting here, writing a letter from a prison cell, but never in my life I have felt so free.

Freedom is a sense of internal peace. It is a mindset, listening to your conscience, to your most inner voice. Even if you are physically constrained like the marine, you can still be free.

We need to honour our inner, emotional, spiritual selves. We cannot deny its existence. We all feel it, especially in the time we feel fully alive.

Such moments can be expressed as being one with God.

Talking about God, we say she is omnipotent, omnipresent, omniscience. If this is true, then God is within everyone and everything; it is within you. Listen to your inner voice expressed by emotions, sensations, and feelings. This is how your God is communicating with you.

Let’s think about the first commandment: “Thou shalt have no other gods before me”.

If God is everywhere, so within you as well, following orders against your conscience (your inner voice of God)  is putting the ones giving orders before God.

By surrendering our freedom, our free will, giving someone authority over ourselves (and the God within us), we are putting them before God.

Old recorded wisdom included in Judaism, Christianity, Islam warns us about such behaviours.

Language, Words, Meaning

Language is very mysterious to me. Words have such a big impact on people. Yet they can mean different thing to different people and most people only accept their understanding. They do not ask for clarifications “is that what you meant?” they even do not want to listen to explanation.

I remember when I used a word I did not intended to and said “upps this is not what I meant” I heard. “No this is what you meant, it was your subconscious talking”.  What a strange perception I thought and asked “What makes you think my subconscious  speaks English”.

I do mix word, sometimes I cannot recall what is the name of the concept I have in mind, or I will say one that sound like the one I intended to use.

For me words are like labels that we use to identify things, concepts, ideas.

It was best explained by my IT lecturer at Queen Mary Collage who wrote his name on a blackboard and asked “what is this?”.

We said:

  • It is you.
  • No I am standing here
  • It is your name
  • No, it is chalk on a black board, arranged in a pattern that points to my name, that points to me.

For me this is what words are: sounds arranged into patterns that we recognised as pointers to concepts, ideas, thoughts. We use them to communicate, as we do  not know how to exchange thoughts in any another way. To do this we would need to be better connected to each other. Some may call it being on the same wavelength.

Words are especially difficult in describing emotions or feelings:  For me each time emotions feelings are different, there will be a variation depending on the situation, circumstances, people involved before and in  the moment.

I do not know about you, but I always have a mixture of emotions. Mixture of feelings.

How do we learn what is the name of an emotion we feel? Well, we look at a situation, observe how we feel, listen to what others are calling it, but the same circumstances can give rise to different emotions.

I remember staying in a hotel in Wales over Easter holidays. There were 3 groups of people English, Italians and Poles. It was long time ago when the TV was only in the lounge and we were watching a comedy show. I found it amazingly funny that each group laughed at different moments (in addition to the laughter on TV). Different cultures, different backgrounds, different sense of humour.


It never stops to amaze me how people spend their time pursuing happiness. The rights of the citizens of the most powerful country that claims to be a democracy says that everyone has the right to pursue happiness. Just think about it, why would anyone want to pursue happiness?  The main reason for anyone to even consider pursuing happiness is – to be unhappy in the first place.  Why would any one who is happy waste their time on pursuing happiness?

This makes it a bit tricky for the government to ensure that everyone can pursue happiness, as they have to make sure that the main condition is satisfied ie that no-one is happy.

The only way one can be happy is to stop pursuing happiness.  Happiness is in the moment, you cannot be happy tomorrow, only today.

Happiness is everywhere where you care to see it. In the eyes of the loved one, in the warmth of the sun, in the darkness of the night, in the music and the silence, in the blue sky and the clouds.  It is all around you, but you are too busy searching for it that you cannot see it.  Just sit back and relax, take a step back from your life, look at it from a distance.

You are standing in front of your happiness with your nose touching it, but you cannot see it. Don’t know what I mean?  Then stand in front of a building touching it with your nose, open your eyes. Can you see the building, or only a wall barrier?  Step back and you will see it, and you can choose to see it as a safe, welcoming place.

When you are perusing happiness, you are like a dog chasing its own tail the harder it tries, the faster it runs, the quicker it seems the tails is getting away from it. Butwe can also see it as the dog running away from its tail.  The only way it can reach its tail, is to stop, calm down and look down between its hind legs.  Important thing is that he does not  get too exited when he finds it.

Grateful for All that is

I remember going for lunch in Sydney. Near Martin Place there is this small lane between old buildings with birdcages spanning across the street. You can hear the birds chirping there and many tourists stop here to listen to the birds that used to be live here. 

I had lunch there at a Chinese restaurant (they server beautiful food there). I felt relaxed, fulfilled, peaceful and while enjoying the whole experience I entered into a state of gratitude for: the food, the sound, the sun, the beauty of this place, 

And I thought who contributed; made sacrifice for me to a be able to enjoy this moment.

The birds did – they are not here any more what I hear is just a recording. There must have been plants here they are gone, animals, aboriginal people they all lived here but had to leave so I can enjoy my time here now.

Someone had to clear this place, most likely the convicts, design it, build, fund and mange the creation of this city. They all had to be fed, get medical attention, trained and educated, transported to work, someone had to grow the food and prepare the meals and I am sure many more people were involved too.  They all had to be born (mothers, midwives) and taken care of (carers doctors teachers). They all contributed for the creation of this place that brings me so much pleasure now.

And now the place is clean (cleaners), chef made my meal, waiter brought it, who created the recipe and what about the chicken that gave up its life and the veggies that I consume: they all made sacrifice so I can enjoy this meal.

For me it is an obvious truth that we are all connected and we all live in an interrelationship/interdependency.  How come so many people do not see it; for me it is obvious.  The air we breathe is the same, we are connected through it; the water we drink. (I read that it is with probability of 1 that every one of us drunk at least one drop of water that passed through a dinosaur’s urinary track) The food we eat (all the life in the soil that is required for us to eat good food). When you look at something I enjoy, I think of what, who, contributed so I can enjoy it.

My Granddad’s Funeral

I remember when my grandfather died. It was 31 December 1970. I was 10-11 at that time.

I remember the whole family gather in his home all uncles, aunties, cousins; some of whom I never met before. We had strong family ties. Everybody was crying, but I could not understand why. Grandpa wanted to die; he prepared everything for his death. At the beginning of the year he stated that he is going to die this year. He asked the close family to come together for Easter, as this will be the last Easter with him. He distributed all his wealth between his children and grandchildren. I remember I got 1,000 zloty and bought myself a hand bag and an alarm clock.

During summer as every year I spent about two weeks on the farm with my dad. My granddad asked my dad to help him build his grave. My dad did not want to do it he said “he will not build a grave for his living father”, but after my granddad started to do it by himself, my dad did help him (he was the only son). Granddad was feeling good all this time and asked every one to come for Christmas.

It was a joyful Christmas everyone was feeling great . We accepted that granddad is talking about his death. After all we heard it for nearly a year and we did not take it seriously, he was feeling great, no symptoms of any illness or weakness.

After Christmas we went back to Warszawa. On the 30rd of December we got a call that granddad is in hospital and we went to Plock and stayed at my auntie’s place. Granddad passed away at 4 am on 31st. I remember it well. During the night I woke up and saw my cousin and she told me that granddad passed away on 4 am. I am a heavy sleeper and just turn around and fell back to sleep.

In the morning and when I went down to the kitchen, everyone was crying and my cousin told me that grandpa passed away. I said “I know. You woke me up to tell me that he died at 4 am.” Every one was shocked; they did not know what time he died. We learned later that it was at 4 am. How did I know? I don’t know.

Granddad’s body was then displayed at home, people were crying; but I could not understand why. He did want to die, this was his wish, why should I cry because my grandfather’s wishes were fulfilled. I thought it was selfish, why deny him his wish.

I went for a walk around the farm. I remembered doing this walk with him . He was telling me about the farm and land or we just walk. It is at that moment that I felt sad, realising that we will not be having these walk together ever again and a tear came to my eyes, but overall I was peaceful and felt love ,his love.

I could never understand why people who believe in God and heaven are so scared of death? Shouldn’t they actually look forward to death; meeting their creator, spending time in heaven for eternity.

Life and death

People are full of fear. From the moment we are born the fear is installed into us. Don’t do this , don’t do that you will hurt yourself, life is dangerous. It is done by our family, friends, religion, media. It surrounds us.

We are so scared of dying we forgot how to live.

Death is part of life you are only alive because you can die. The only things that cannot die are dead already. The ability to die makes you alive; by being scared of death you limit your life .

Let me tell you now you are going to die . If you are not then you are dead already.

It is amazing that people who claim they believe in heaven and hell are the one’s most scared of death?! They say they believe, they say they are good, so they expect to go to heaven. Why are they scared of death then.

Why do they cry at funerals; do they believe that the person being buried is going to hell. If not the should be happy for them. They feel sorry for themselves; not for the person that is gone; they will miss them and that hurts. Get over it; this is life; this is the way it supposed to be.

questions we ask

I hear people asking questions and think you are asking the wrong person.

I saw a big sign on a Jewish school “Why do Arabs Hate us?”  If you want to know the answer to a question Why does someone hate me?; ask yourself the same question :Why do you hate them? We perceive the world in our image you think others hate you well make an internal inquiry maybe it is you that hates others.

How can you be certain about other people ‘s Why? Isn’t it more important to know your own Why?

Another question

I went to a “wealth presentation” where the presenter asked this question “Can you count on your kids to provide for you at retirement”?

Again this is not your question; your question is “Would you provide for your parents retirement?” This is what you have control of. Only after you answer this question you can start contemplating the other.

The first one is not your question; it is not you that needs to answer; it is your kids.  I have a big suspicion that their answer will be very similar to yours.  If you are absolutely sure that you will take care of your parents; why would you doubt that your kids will do the same for you.

If you are not prepared to take care of your parents; why should your kids take care of you?  What values did you teach them?  Taking care of parents is obviously not one of them.

From fear to oneness

Fear, fear, fear creeping on us from every where from the moment we are born our parent just worn us do not do this, not do that, this is dangerous, it can hurt you.

You are born and go into this world with hope and trust, open heart, open mind and open arms; ready to embrace anything that comes your way.

And then you get hurt it is usually the by people closes to you. They are trying to protect you; so they hurt you; punish you.  It is for your own good; so you are safe; they say.  Safe from what? from life itself!

But you still love them. Deep inside we are all love. It is not the love between a man an a woman. It is a sense of peacefulness, contentment lack of fear. It is this bliss, the orgasm of life.

Lack of fear is the natural state we are all supposed to be in. This is what meditation can bring, this is what forgiveness can bring. This blissful feeling of being one in the full sense. One as complete; one as one with everything; one as separate; one as connected.

Fight and Hurt

My beliefs we are, that we are all part of the same consciousness; like cells in a multi-organism; and yet we fight with each other.

It looks to me like your right hand fighting with your left hand. I does not make sense. We are all one. But we cannot see it. We blame others for our behaviour; saying: “oh they did this, so he had to do this no you did not.”

There is no specific way you have to react; you are not a computer program; you have a choice.

You cannot fight evil with evil. This creates more evil.

You feel hurt; so you want to hurt someone else. You feel that you have the right to hurt them.  After all they hurt you.  However just think. According to this rule by hurting them you just granted them with the right to hurt you!

Also does hurting others really ease your pain?

And now as they are hurting, is your hurt any less; did it go away just because you hurt someone else?

You cannot pass your feelings onto someone else; all you do is create feelings in them, they are not your feelings.

Jesus got it right; turn the other chick; those without a sin should trow the first stone;  who fights by the sword dies by the sword.  There are so many so called Christians around the world but how many of them follow Jesus teaching. What do you think is more important to him, that you believe he is the son of God or that you live the way he was teaching to live in peace and love.

It is like humans cannot see the other side. All they care about is them; their feelings and they do not realise that the person on the other side is also human and they have the same feelings similar thoughts.

I cannot understand why people fight;  why they want revenge does it really help them? why do they want others to suffer? . Because they suffered? Does this ease their pain; if some one else suffers.  It is forgiveness that sooths your pain.  So why do you insist on punishing, hurting others?  OK they are hurt now.  So, they are also human and what; now they want to punish, hurt someone.  And the story goes on for centuries, millenniums on and on and on. Crazy world stupid people.


Power of Respect and Expectations

Here are two stories that  I would like to share the stories.  Stories that shaped who I am and influenced my way of looking at this strange world.

I remember my first job.  I was a teacher in a very rough area and had difficulties in crowd control. The kids would misbehave  walk around the classroom be noisy. I  spoke about my problems in the staff room and the other teachers  said that  some kids especially in this area are basically uncontrollable.  They mentioned  Robert (a 14 year old ) from class 8 B who they said was the worst, very disrespectful,  rude, who would disrupt the whole class.   I was surprised because for me this was the best behaved class and I could not remember anyone being disruptive.  The consensus was that most probably he was not in the class when I was teaching there.  Next time I went to class 8B I was observing the class very carefully.  Again they were well behaved.  I noticed that I had a helper.  There was this boy at the back who would bring to order anyone that would try to misbehave.  That was Robert.  I was shocked.  I shared it in the staff room.  The teachers came to just one explanation: he fell in love with me.  I did not buy it.  Not because I though it was impossible (I was in my early 20ties and looked like a teenager) but because one can see whether some is in love with you or not.

Next time after the lesson I asked Robert to stay behind because I want to ask him just one question.  I told him that in the staff room all the teachers complain about his behaviour, however on my lessons he is basically perfect.  There is absolutely nothing I can say against him. WHY?

He looked at me with his cold eyes and said: Because you are the only person in my life that said please and thank you to me. As he finished he left and I stayed there speechless.  How little is needed to change someone’s attitude; just few kind words. Yet we do it so rarely.   I made my decision I will treat everyone with respect and kindness to bring out the good in them.

I also remembered the first day in that class.  I walked into the class room and Robert was standing on a desk near the window.  It was hot and stuffy in the room.  I said to him You look like a helpful guy, as you are standing up could you please open the window it is a bit stuffy here.  He hesitated for a while and opened the window.  I said thank you very mush. You are very kind.  And that was it.

It just reminded me another story.  My friend lived in another “bad” rough neighbourhood.  The local youth gang would rule the street after dark and other people were scared to go out. She was always trying to get home early but one night she did not make it.  It was late and dark as she got of the bus.  How was she going to walk home safely. She looked around leaving the bus and on the other side of the street was the gang with their leader, well known in the neighbourhood.  She said she does not know why she did what she did, it was instinctive. She walk straight  up to the leader and said. Excuse me sir, but this is such a rough area  and I am scared to go home.  Would you be kind enough to walk me there.  I do not live very far. He looked at her a bit strangely  and said OK.  As they walk the whole gang followed them. They exchanged just few words on the way.  In front of her house she thanked him and the other for their trouble.  As they turned to walk away the leader said. Do not fear anything in this area.  If anyone troubles you just say that you know “….” And he gave her his code name.